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Love4Yumi
 Posted: Jul 21 2010, 03:51 PM
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Today I'm going to review the first game of my favorite racing series....

ATV OFFROAD FURY
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This was my first Playstation2 game I ever played. My uncle let me borrow 2 PS2 games until I could get my own. Those 2 games were ATV Offroad Fury & Crash Bandicoot: The Wrath Of Cortex. I found Wrath Of Cortex to be a frusterating dissapointment but I loved Offroad Fury. I'll discuss Offroad Fury today.

ATV Offroad Fury is just like every other racing game in the fact that you have to cross the finish line before the other drivers. The catch is that you race with ATV's, nature's suicide machine.

The game is very simple, yet intricate with it's function called "preloading". By slinging the joystick down or pressing the down directional button at the base of a jump, you get more hang time as you launch off a hill or ramp. It's all about timing with preloading, you want to use it to navigate a series of hills/bumps without slowing down, but if you just launch yourself off every ramp, you'll either launch yourself off the road or waste valuable seconds floating in the air.

Which of course brings me to the subject of performing stunts. You can perform stunts while in the air to earn points. By going for more intricate & complicated stunts by pressing & holding a combination of buttons, you can earn more points but these tricks are harder to land. To be honest, outside of Freestyle Mode, tricks are pretty useless & just wastes of time outside of Freestyle. The risk of crashing is not worth it in a race. To steal a line from Drew Carrey; "The game where everything is made up & the points don't matter."

On to the game modes. Nationals is basically a series of outdoor racing tracks that test your basic driving skill. Supercross is a series of indoor stadium tracks that pretty much demands you to have mastered peloading. (Doing tricks in a Supercross makes the crowd go crazy if you wanna do that) Enduros are checkpoint races across a vast terrain that encourage you to look for the fastest routes to the checkpoints. The afromentioned Freestyle is the opposite of Who's Line Is It Anyway where the points DO matter. The Career mode is basically your ticket to unlocking more tracks & a secret ATV. (*spoiler* It's the perfect vehicle) To be honest, the game is not very deep & it kinda lacks in terms of features & unlockables.

ATV Offroad Fury is far from a complex game & delivers a great offroad racing experiance to Playstation owners. (Offroad racing games on the PS1 were terrible to say the least) It's a little lacking in terms of content & it's graphics aren't Gran Turismo level, but it's simplicity is a welcome change from the Gran Turismo & Gran Turismo rip-offs out there. Plus you get to exploit a fun trick I love doing.

Keep driving in a straight line in Freeride mode. (no time limits, no race track, just open-ended exploring) Eventually, you reach a large canyon. Climb up the canyon (yes you can do that) then as you reach the other side of the canyon & drive forward, you eventually get pushed backwards hundreds of feet in the air. Take that physics!

It's a very simple & fun experiance, & a nowadays a Burger King meal costs more then this game, now that's a steal.

SCORE 4/5

PROS
- Simple
- Throws realism out the window
- Has a bit of strategy involved with navigating the tracks.
- Well executed game modes that don't at all rip off each other.
- About $3 at Gamestop stores.

CONS
-Lacks unlockables.
- Graphics aren't exceptional.

I hope you enjoyed this review & remember, video games are made up & the points don't matter.

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Love4Yumi
 Posted: Jul 29 2010, 03:38 PM
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Well, I reviewed one TV show (Hi Hi). Now it's time to review another... And which one will my random lottery called thoughts select?...... Nickelodeon's "cartoon" abomination...

FANBOY & CHUM-CHUM (Doesn't deserve a picture)
As you might have noticed, Nick has NO VARIETY WHATSOEVER. They really only have 5 shows.

Spongebob (Over-the-hill)
iCarly (GARBAGE!)
Penguins Of Madagascar (Like it, never even seen the movies)
Big Time Rush (Jonas rip-off)
This wretched disease (what I'm talking about right now)

So what is this disease upon animation about? It's about these two morons named Fanboy & Chum-Chum who dress like superheros... But don't do anything that's not stupid. And that's as far as the premise goes. Great start huh?

Wait a minute... These are some of the dumbest names anyone could possibly give a character! Fanboy & Chum-Chum? (Dumb A--hole & Fat Moron would be better names, at least they would be accurate) a bully named Boog? (Why not Greg, Bubbles, or anything else?) A girl named Yo? (I'm not joking here) And the wizard... Kyle. (Are you serious? All these other stupid names & you give the wizard kid a normal, but bland name?) Kyle is actually the best character on this terrible show but he doesn't get much screentime.

The other characters are all totally stupid. Fanboy is a complete idiot who somehow thinks he's cooler then a freezer. (Urge to shoot gun at his head rising...) Chum-Chum is... Well... Just a gross idiot. Case closed. Boog just basically says "Bop" about everything & is in love with a Chimp Chomp arcade machine... I'm NOT trying to be funny here... This is serious... He actually loves a machine. Yo is disturbingly obssesed with Chum-Chum (It's REALLY creepy & I wouldn't like it on an adult show, let alone a kid friendly one).

I watch at least 3 episodes of a show before I judge that it's garbage or not (Yes Zillaman... I actually sat through MORE THEN 5 SECONDS!!!! Call it mental suicide but I did it so anyone reading this doesn't have to) & I really must say... The episode plots are VERY stupid & moronic.

One episode called "The Janitor Strikes Back" introduces a janitor called Poopetine (I'm dead serious, they take Palpatine from Star Wars & replace Palp with Poop) who's "out to destroy all gum in the galaxy" (Galaxy? It's a flipping classroom) But our moron heroes (if they can even be called that) kept a large wad of gum called Yum-Yum (WTF?!) inside their desk & take it home where it comes to life. (I'm dead serious, it actually comes alive & talks) Gosh, they pretty much steal dialouge right from Star Wars ("We will crush their rebellion" or "everything that has transpired has done so according to my design"). Geez, have they ever heard of creativity?

Another episode had Fanboy trying to set a world record for being filthy. (No bath or showers of any kind) First of all, I doubt they have a record for that & it'a gross idea in general. But what truly makes it disgusting & idiotic is that a pair of mushrooms grow on his hand & take over his arm. It basically talks like a gangster movie & has some sort of "Stink-eye mind trick" which basically is a rip-off of a Jedi mind trick. (Why do they keep stealing from Star Wars, WHY?! Also, stupid things coming to life for no reason, UGH, it's terrible!)

And the last one I saw before I started hearing angels cry had Dumb A--hole & Fat Moron walking an old, dirty cup that... Acts like a dog. (Again, I'm NOT JOKING!!) Boog & some guy I don't care about try to steal the cup because some fatso said it was valuable or something. (Don't worry about my mental health because that's when I stopped watching)

One last thing. The animation is terrible. All their eyes look like glass & it's really hard for them to actually make a convincing facial expression. Also, they do things like have their brains pop out or take their arm off & put it back on, you know, shattering the laws of physics. That kind of thing is just not good looking in CGI animation. It's weird & just creepy. 2-D animation does that stuff much better.

All in all, it's stuff like this that's causing stupidity in children. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.

SCORE: -9999999/5

PROS
-Abysmal ratings have got to get this disease cancelled right? Nick can't be stupid enough to renew this... Right?

CONS
-EVERYTHING! Case closed.

I'm going to need to review something good in order to get my mind off this... Mabye... Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal next week.

This is Love4Yumi, signing out.

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Zillaman
 Posted: Aug 8 2010, 08:11 PM
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Wow. Now I know why I only watched it for 5 seconds. My gosh, you got a lot of guts my friend to sit through three episodes.

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Love4Yumi
 Posted: Aug 10 2010, 05:17 PM
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It's time.... Time for my long-awaied review of the golden child of the Ratchet & Clank franchise....

RATCHET & CLANK: UP YOUR ARSENAL
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BACKSTORY TIME!
One day, when I was at EBGames (Gamestop used to be called that... Gosh, I feel old) & I saw 2 games on the PS2 shelf, right next to one another. The 2 games in question were Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal & Shadow The Hedgehog. I just started playing T rated games at this time. I remember Sonic The Hedgehog from my childhood, but I loved Ratchet & Clank: Going Commando. My family was starting to get impatient & told me to just pick something. After much debate, I decided on Up Your Arsenal because I was familiar with the R&C series & I had not been familiar with recent Sonic games. This is all before I started reading game reviews.

Years later, reading game reviews... I'm REALLY glad I did NOT choose Shadow The Hedgehog. I've seen an X-Play review for it on the internet & the camera looked terrible & the concept of cars & guns in a Sonic game seemed... Unfitting.

And I've been happy with Up Your Arsenal, spending months playing it.
END OF BACKSTORY

Up Your Arsenal follows the events in Ratchet & Clank: Going Commando. Ratchet & Clank are chilling out inside ther Megapolis apartment watching an episode of Secret Agent Clank when they learn that Veldin is under attack by an alien race called the Thyrranoids, led by a robotic supervillian named Dr.Nefarious & Ratchet & Clank race off to Veldin to save the planet from Nefarious' forces. Upon discovering that the disgraced superhero Captain Qwark is the only one to have ever defeated Dr.Nefarious, they set off to find Qwark, who apparently went on board the looney train & now thinks he's a monkey. Upon restoring his memory, Captain Qwark takes charge & forms an alliance of past R&C characters known as the Q-Force to foil the evil Dr.Nefarious. The story has a lot of hillarious scenes, memorable diolouge & Dr.Nefarious is the most hillarious antagonist ever, especially when he short-circuits & freezes up. (I won't spoil anything, you might be able to find something on Youtube about it)

This is widley considered by many as the best R&C game with good reason. The game is longer then Going Commando with every bit of the gameplay & weapon variety that has come to be expected from the series & one of my personal favorites, the returning weapons. I said in my review of Going Commando that the returning weapons sucked & were not worth bolts. This time around, the returning weapons are some of the best weapons. Miss the Shield Charger? It's here. Miss that accurate Plasma Coil? It's here too. You can get all these for FREE if you have R&C2 data on your memory card. Heck, R&C1 weapons make a comeback with the Suck Cannon & Agents Of Doom (everyone loves tiny, robot minions) coming at a discount price if you have R&C1 data. I did some math a long time ago & having the data of both games can save you MILLIONS of bolts in purchases. That'll help you get those more expensive weapons.

Back to the weapon variety. There is an even wider arsenal of weapons. A multi-target lightning zapper known as the Spitting Hydra, the flaming Plasma Whip, the gross Infector for making your enemies fight each other, the Rift Inducer, an interdimensional hole that sucks up enemies & a new morphing weapon (this time enemies morph into... Ducks!). Weapons can now climb up to level 5, up to level 8 in challenge mode, an addicting reason to blow up crud & add to the replay value. Clank segments play very well & will be very familiar with anyone who's played R&C before. Clank even gets a new bannana gun to guide around a monkey sidekick (abusing him is really funny). There are also levels where you fight alongside cowardice robots known as the Galactic Rangers that resemble a lot of what you'll see in Multiplayer.

Yes, Insomniac finally made R&C multiplayer. But does it compare to First-Person Shooters? Yes, yes it does. It's got R&C's signature weapons & where else can you morph an opposing player into a cuddly sheep? The game modes are like other shooter multiplayer games with Capture The Flag, Deathmatch & the Seige mode. In Seige mode, you seek to capture the opponent's team base but you must first destroy gatling turrets that guard the base. To help with that cause, your team can capture nodes throughout the battlefield, giving you access to things like vehicles, weapons, galactic rangers, turrets, etc.

The multiplayer action gets very hectic & fast-paced & my favorite game mode is always a free-for-all Deathmatch.

Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal is not much more then a big refinement of Going Commando, but the exciting & hetic multiplayer, a longer adventure that has even more variety then Going Commando, the hillarious diolouge, antagonist & weapons(I always chuckle when I use my Qwack-O-Ray) give this game a special place in my heart & have earned this game a spot on my Top 10.

SCORE 5/5

PROS
-A very humurous story & characters.
-An even bigger varity of weapons
-Weapons upgrade even further then before, keeping the addiction of blowing stuff up alive
-A great & hectic multiplayer
-Longer then Going Commando, so you enjoy more of it.

CONS
-Hacker puzzles can annoy. (minor flaw)

It's games like Up Your Arsenal that really make me love Insomniac Games as a development team & what really solidified my relationship with the R&C franchise. I wrote The Nathan Chronicals Episode III as a tribute to this fantastic game & it was the most fun I've ever had writing a story.

I'm going to review a personal favorite movie of mine... Mel Brooks' finest peice of work. See you next week.

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Zillaman
 Posted: Aug 12 2010, 09:22 PM
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Great review!

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Love4Yumi
 Posted: Aug 27 2010, 09:25 PM
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Sorry if I'm late, the first week of school is always hectic. Now it's time to review a personal favorite of mine, Mel Brooks' comedic triumph.

SPACEBALLS
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Released well before I came unto this earth, Spaceballs is.... Yep, it's obvious, a parody of Star Wars, but it also parodies Star Trek & Alien.

The plot begins with President Skroob (played by Mel Brooks) & his right-hand man Dark Helmet scheming to steal the air supply from planet Druidia because they wasted their own air supply & are now surviving on air in a can. They plan to kidnap Princess Vespa who is about to marry a narcoleptic prince back on her homeworld. Resenting the marriage, she runs away with her servent droid Dot Matrix, only to get captured by Spaceball One when she blasts off into space.

Meanwhile, Vespa's father King Roland in desperation, hires a man known as Captain Lone Star & his mog (half-man, half-dog) sidekick Barf to rescue her. Lone Star & Barf agree because they are desperate to pay off a debt they owe to a gangster known as.... Pizza The Hut. (Chuckles saying that)

That's all the plot I plan on spoiling, really this movie is a cult classic with many tributes to not just Star Wars, but also Star Trek & the movie Alien in a scene near the end of the movie. But what Spaceballs gets right that so many other parodies get wrong (pay close attention Jason Friedburg & Aaron Seltzer, or as I call those two, "hacks") is that they don't, I repeat, DON'T, just throw pop culture refrences for no real reason. Spaceballs has a target audience in mind, the sci-fi audience. It also has great jokes & comedic timing. ("What's the matter Col. Sanders? Chicken?" ^-^) Mel Brooks may have made some mistakes in his career (trying to make a Spaceballs TV series on the ghetto-garbage channel G4 for instance) but he had an ability to make parodies that are true to their source material & were actually funny to watch even if you weren't a flat-out fan of a genre.

(For the record, Brooks made another funny parody called "Dracula: Dead & Loving It", which is WAY better then "Vampires Suck")

I'm sorry if it sounds like I was talking about Spaceballs & then going off about the parody genre, but really, what else is there to know about Spaceballs? It's a funny movie that's bound to get a chuckle or two out of you even if you're not a Star Wars geek. It's the gold standard for what a parody movie should be & now-a-days, cruddy movies (Friedburg & Seltzer dry.gif ) litter the parody genre & aren't even worthy of a consolation prize.

SCORE: 5/5

PROS
-Meets target audience perfectly
-Avoids being moronic
-Stong sense of comedic timing
-Great jokes & lines
-Is there really any other choice for parody movies?

CONS
-A little dated, coming out after the luster of the original Star Wars trilogy.

(Deep, dramatic voice) Next time on Love4Yumi's Review Station...

Watch our reviewer struggle to overcome the urge to strangle a TV channel...

Uncover decent plots sometimes, but annoying main characters....

And some episodes with absolutly dumb & inane plots...

Our reviewer will come face-to-face with.....

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

Only on Shin Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi Dreams.

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Zillaman
 Posted: Aug 28 2010, 12:42 PM
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This outta be good.

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Love4Yumi
 Posted: Sep 6 2010, 05:29 PM
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It's time... Time that I faced a pop culture phenominon & dive deep into it... It's time to review...

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS
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Back in the early 2000's (not sure what we can call last decade, the 00's?) a man named Stephen Hillenburg had an idea for a cartoon, a strange idea that involved marine life with a kitchen sponge. And just like that, Spongebob Squarepants was born & became a cultural icon, much like Homer Simpson from The Simpsons.

Let's fast forward to the new decade & Spongebob is just as popular as ever, but is it because of quality or a lack of other cartoon choices? It's time to find out.

During the show's first 3 seasons, it was full of smart humor, charming characters & even a little something for older audiences (I'll always love the episode "Sailor Mouth").

Then Stephen Hillenburg decided to make The Spongebob Squarepants Movie. The movie was a big success in theaters, although I noticed that Spongebob acted a bit more childish. It had a good story, a good & uncliche ending & seemed like a good way to end the series as Stephen Hillenburg left the show to work on other projects.

And it did end the series.... For a few years I think. But then, new writers got a hold of Spongebob & decided to make a 4th season.

"That's great news!" one would think. "I missed Spongebob, it's great to have it back!". Well, Season 4 came around, starting with the episodes Fear Of A Krabby Patty/Shell Of A Man. Let's watch shall we?

(30 minutes later)
WHAT HAVE THEY DONE?! The characters are almost nothing like their old selves except apperance & physical color. Fear Of A Krabby Patty had one of the stupidest scenes I've ever seen. It's where Plankton, in yet another scheme to steal the Krabby Patty secret formula, puts Spongebob into a deep sleep via hypnosis & Spongebob has a dream sequence involving a "scary" Krabby Patty handing him a cookie pizza (WTH?) & stealing a scene from E.T with "I'm right here". GAH! THIS IS SO IDIOTIC! I don't even want to discuss Shell Of A Man, it's creepy to watch.

And this has become a glaring theme with Spongebob these days. A lot of episodes have such stupid plots, they might as well NOT have a plot. ("The Splinter" has Spongebob getting a splinter at work. That's the plot, no joke & it only gets worse from there & it was bad from the start.)

And another thing, the characters are so annoying now. The writers always find ways to push the stereotypes of them (Spongebob= Crybaby, Patrick= Braindead moron, Mr.Krabs= Cheap & Sandy= Texas girl) & it gets annoying. I often say to myself "We get it, Krabs is cheap, why push it so much?"

Yes, in only one season we've gone from:
-Spongebob being an optimistic, young sponge, to an obnoxious crybaby who seriously cries in every episode it seems.
-Patrick being dim, but loveable to an absolute idiot who somehow thinks higher of himself then others. (No really, he does it a lot)
-Mr.Krabs wanting to save money on things, to an absolute miser who is the most unlikeable S.O.B in modern cartoons.
-Sandy being a texas girl to a scientist for no apparent reason who's southern accent is borderline offensive & who CAN'T SING AT ALL!!!
-Plankton being calculated & kinda funny to a guy who whines of his failure all the time, although he's still one of the better characters.
-Squidward from being grumpy & grouchy to actually sympathetic because everyone else is being annoying.

ARRRRRGHHHH!!!!!

Speaking of Mr.Krabs, he is so unlikeable now. Anytime I hear of an episode involving him, I think "Great, so what's this unlikeable jerk up to now?" He just has nothing likeable anymore & I would NEVER work for a guy like that despite Spongebob's love of his job.

This just blows... Wait, what's this? A TV special? Atlantis Squarepantis? It's longer then the episodes so mabye now, the writers can come up with something to save the show...

TO BE CONTINUED TOMMOROW (post's getting big)

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Zillaman
 Posted: Sep 6 2010, 07:00 PM
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I stopped watching Spongebob midway through Season 4, I just couldn't keep up with it, and I also didn't like the new direction it was taking.

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Love4Yumi
 Posted: Sep 8 2010, 02:32 AM
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LAST TIME ON L4Y'S REVIEW STATION
-What a strange concept.
-Rating juggernaut!
-Movie!
-Stephen Hillenburg is gone.
-Spongebob is over...
-Comeback!
-WHAT HAVE THEY DONE?
-GAH! THIS IS AWFUL!
-TV special?

Spongebob first ventured onto the ship called television specials with Atlantis Squarepantis & well.... It's arguably the worst episode in the show's history. I'm just gonna get it out of the way cause it's really awful.

It all starts with Spongebob & Patrick trying to take a picture of a bubble (nice use of camera huh?). However, it keeps popping & we get a musical number about how nothing is permanent. Hmmm... Imperminence is awfully deep for something like Spongebob, mabye the writers finally got their heads out of you-know-what & finally discovered competence....

That's thrown out the window by the time the find the second half of an ancient medalion is found that summons a bus to the kingdom of Atlantis. It's somewhat decent so far...

Then they discover that the bus runs not on fuel.... But by singing. (I'm dead serious... Singing.... My eye is twitching right now.) And we get lousy musical numbers from Spongebob & the other characters, including Plankton who snuck in the glove compartment. (Don't ask me how)

They crash-land to Atlantis. Yes, they finally arrive in the legendary lost paradise of Atlantis & I know what you're thinking, King Neptune's gonna show up right? Good guess but WRONG! Instead of seeing the Neptune from "Neptune's Spatula" or the Neptune from the movie, we instead get THIS:
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Just what the heck is this thing supposed to be anyway? At least with Neptune, you could tell it was a Merman, Patrick's a starfish & Mr.Krabs a crab, but seriously, what is that thing? A mutant jelly bean with a Borat thong & glass brain? Just how lazy were the designers here? They couldn't even settle for one eye color!

This is arguably the worst thing about this "special", there is absolutly no reason to NOT use King Neptune & they did... Not use Neptune. I COULD HAVE DONE BETTER THEN THIS! GAH!

And so, Lord Royal Highness A.K.A. Mutant Jelly Bean/Borat Thong Thing leads our group of misfits on a tour to show off the accomplishments of Atlantis....

And so, one by one Spongebob & friends find rooms that just so happen to have their desires in them (Krabs= Money, Squidward= Art, etc) and they all sing about it.

Remember when I said that the new Sandy could not sing at all? Well after Mr.Krabs stays behind in the money room & they witness a machine that turns anything into ice cream (They test a comb & it works, but that's stupid because not only is it impossible but it would taste awful), they somehow stumble unto a machine for germ-fighting... That warps them into a video game (Great, insult gamers while you're at it). Oh my gosh, her singing makes my ears bleed (picture Alvin & The Chipmunks & multiply that by 10) & she sings about chemicals & other stuff that really only applies to chemical engineers. Way to keep a kid's attention Nickelodeon, way to butcher your characters Nickelodeon, way to make my ears bleed Nickelodeon, way to replace the undersea god Neptune with a mutant jelly bean/borat thong thing who doesn't even have a matching eye color!

NICKELODEON! ARRRRRGGGGGHHHH!!!!
(We are experiancing technical difficulties, please stand by tommorow for further review... That means TO BE CONTINUED)
Renamon: "Calm down Nathan, remember your blood pressure."

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Zillaman
 Posted: Sep 8 2010, 10:01 PM
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Wow, not even your review of this episode could make it make sense. You lost me at, "picture of a bubble."

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Love4Yumi
 Posted: Sep 9 2010, 03:13 AM
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Renamon: "Calm down Nathan. Try & think of something soft, fuzzy & soothing."
(Nathan hugs Renamon)
Nathan: "Fuzzy... Now where was I?"
Renamon: "I beleive you were going off on bad singing."

Ugh, is this "special" over yet?

Eventually, Spongebob & Patrick are the only ones left on the tour... Yeah, eliminating people one by one going through a tour of a mystical place.... Why does that sound familiar?... Oh yeah, it's because this is ripping off Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory! Great, how can this get any worse?

I know how! It happens next as Borat Thong Thing decides to leave Spongebob & Patrick alone with Atlantis' most valued treasure.... Not a tailisman, not an ancient book, not a chaos emerald, not even a Renamon plushie... But the world's oldest bubble. (I'm serious here, Atlantis & all their weapons, ice cream stuff & what-not is second rate to a bubble. I guess Atlantis was lost because of their low values.)

And I honestly don't need to tell you what happens. The bubble pops & Spongebob & Patrick confess it at the dinner gathering but Borat Thong Thing reveals it was fake & that he has the real bubble.... Which Patrick then pops by trying to take a picture of it. Mutant Jelly Bean's anger manegment thong tightens as he orders those "hostile" bubble-poppers captured.

After a short escape sequence involving Sandy using the others as weapons (cause the others are too stupid to do anything individually), they get confronted by Plankton, who earlier snuck into the locked weapons room & took a giant tank.

Guess this is it for Spongebob & friends right? The tank gets ready to fire &... It shoots FLIPPING ICE CREAM!!! What... The... *Beep*? I don't think even Disney has anything that stupid. I can imagine Atlantis disarming their weapons for dealing with intruders, but using a dairy product as a weapon is MORONIC!

Renamon: "Way to go Atlantis. Your defense is only useful against the lactose intolerant."

And so, Borat Thong Thing decides to take Plankton "the talking speck" & use him to replace the popped bubble, Spongebob & company go home in the singing driven bus, the others whining about not wanting to leave Atlantis. THE END. (Thank goodness)

Let me sum up this I.Q insulting "special" that might as well be called "Spongebob: The Ear Bleeding Musical":
-A song about how nothing is permanent
-They find the gateway to Atlantis
-Neptune is replaced with a Mutant Jelly Bean/Borat Thong Thing.
-Sandy is the worst singer I've ever heard.
-It rips off Willy Wonka.
-Spongebob & Patrick ruin everything, like they always do in modern seasons.
-An ice cream shooting tank, something even Phineas & Ferb would find stupid.
-My brain shut down & I'm drooling.

Why did I spend so much time talking about a TV special that even in my childhood, I would find moronic? Because it perfectly describes everything that's wrong with modern Spongebob: annoying characters, idiotic outcomes, lousy singing (and I can tolerate songs in cartoons/anime, *still holds out hope someday that Renamon sings in English*^-^) & just an insult to anyone's I.Q.

This is it, this must be the end for Spongebob. There is absolutley no way they can come back from that disaster right?

Find out... Tommorow! (Final part tommorow, I swear)

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Zillaman
 Posted: Sep 9 2010, 08:37 PM
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Did you know David Bowie was the voice of Atlantis' leader in this special? You can say he lost a bet.

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Love4Yumi
 Posted: Sep 9 2010, 11:09 PM
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Hey David Bowie, wanna play the role of a Mutant Jelly Bean/Borat Thong Thing?
Bowie: "A what now?"

When we last left off, Spongebob's first-ever TV special was a disaster as the show's sudden case of stupidity was on full display for 30 minutes instead of 12. Somehow, the show made it to Season 5 & it's just as dumb & moronic as Season 4 with an episode where Spongebob waits for a toy in the mail & another really dump episode... To Love A Patty. It has Spongebob falling in love with a Krabby Patty... (One thing to the episode's credit, it makes my infatuation wih Renamon seem normal by comparison).... And no, it does not disclose the "rumors" about Spongebob (regarding sexuality).

By what I've just said over the last few days, Spongebob should have been cancelled by then... But Nickelodeon really had no other show that could draw in viewers (especially since The Fairly OddParents, another show I used to like a lot fell into the same dimension of obnoxious stupidity as Spongebob). So Nick had to keep Spongebob on the air.... And so, through divine intervention, the writers got fired. (THANK GOODNESS! There really is a God!)

Season 6 & beyond were no doubt better then Seasons 4 & 5, but the characters were still annoying & some episodes are totally stupid & idiotic... But occasionaly, there was a good episode. Yes, a good episode of modern Spongebob. That only comes around in a full moon. I kinda liked "Sand Castles In The Sand" because it's nonsensical in a good way & actually shows some imagination. I kinda liked "Toy Store Of Doom" cause it reminds me of Goosebumps books for some reason.

Mind you, it's not as good as the first 3 seasons, but occasional competence is better then no competence & the new writers are better then the ones that came before them.

After all this, it's finally time to grade Spongebob....
(drumroll please)

SCORE: 3/5

PROS
-The first 3 seasons.
-Keeps Nickelodeon from completly bottoming out like Cartoon Network.
-Competence occasionaly shows in later years.

CONS
-Seasons 4 & 5.
-The TV specials keep sucking cause they have idiotic conclusions, it doesn't matter if they have David Bowie or Johhny Depp as guest stars.
-Characters are very grating in large doses.

Final words? Spongebob is still a popular show... Although it lacks competition. Only Phineas & Ferb is a real threat from another channel. The only other show Nick has that's any good is The Penguins Of Madagascar. As long as there aren't any more seasons like 4 & 5, I can assume that Nick will never cancel it.

NEXT TIME, ONE OF THE FOLLOWING
-Review of Ratchet: Deadlocked
-Top 10 animated ladies
-Review of The Garfield Movie.

Hope you enjoyed this (lengthy) review.

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Zillaman
 Posted: Sep 10 2010, 08:34 PM
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Great review.

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