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> i_love_ami's Movie Reviews, Going from Video Games to Movies
i_love_ami
 Posted: Jan 2 2009, 01:28 AM
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This isn't a movie review, but I feel that it kinda fits in this topic. I've been thinking about this for a while. What is happening to movies these days?

A lot of sub-par movies are being made these days. Some are just plain aweful. Here are the key things that make a movie and what I think is becoming of them these days.

The Plot: The plot is probably one of the most important parts to a movie. On one hand, the plot can be so great that the visuals can look like total crap and the movie is still good. On the other hand, the plot can be so horrible that no amount of special effects or hype can save it. To me it seems like people today care more for special effects or appealing characters rather than a good plot. Movies today are either using plots that we've seen a million times before (such as the sports movie plot) or that are so full of holes that by the end you're saying, "What the hell was this movie even about?". Hell, I've seen trailers for such movies and was already saying stuff like that. But I guesse it's to be expected in a world were we've done just about everything.

The Characters: What makes a good character? Who can say? People have grown to love (in a non-romantic way) so many different kinds of characters. Some with mysterious backstories, some with personalities they can relate with or some who you don't know what it is that makes them loveable. But once again, movies these days are filled with characters that hard to fall in love with since they are too underdeveloped or too overdeveloped that by the end of the movie, you could care less about what happens to them. What happed to characters that you could laugh at that weren't part of a comedy? Or characters you could make you cry when something tragic happens to them?

The Visuals: Honestly, movies today seem to be all about the special effects. Sure, most older movies can't possibly compete with what we've got today, but a movie shouldn't be judged by it's visual effects. What does it matter if you can tell if something looks like it's CGI compared to the real thing? Yeah, movies today have the whole CGI eplosions and fire, but even the latest of Godzilla movies still use real fire and firecrackers/cherry bombs for scenes where buildings are on fire or exploding and that usually looks better by comparison. I guesse it's like what Cinnemassacre (AKA The Angry Video Game Nerd) said when mentioning the CGI effects in Godzilla 2000, "It just looks better when there's actually someting in front of the camera".

The Hype: Here's what really kills a movie these days. Most of the time, movies are all hyped up by ads and merchandise and when the movie finally hits theaters, it really didn't live up to all the hype. A good example would be the 1998 American remake of Godzilla. I remember when I first heard about it. Like many Godzilla fans, I practically sh*t myself with exitement. I couldn't go anywhere without seeing some kind of promotion for the movie. I was so exited about this movie. However, when I finally saw it, my first impression was, "What the hell?!" I was only 8 at the time, but I was severely disappointed. There were other movies that suffered from this same problem (such as The Phantom Menace). It seemed like the people who made the movie were in it more for the money.

The Critics: This is the main factor in what determines a movie as good or not these days. Why do we have these people?! They seem to control what's considered good. Because of these evil bastards, so many good movies are ignored by the general public. So many directors' ideas and dreams are destroyed by these (CENSORD DIALOGUE) becuase nine out of ten movies that they actually like are all ideas that we've seen so many times that it's a wonder that directors even bother making them. And whats worse is that the general public actually agrees with them. WTF!? Are people today so dumb that they no longer know what entertains them and they need someone else to tell them what's good and what's not?! And is originality to confusing for today's audience?! Could someone please kill these people?! What was I supposed to be saying in this section here...

I think that the point of my post was lost somewhere along the line, but nonetheless, my point has been made (I hope).

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Zillaman
 Posted: Jan 2 2009, 02:58 PM
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I agree with everything you put here.

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Cyber-Crash
 Posted: Jan 2 2009, 04:55 PM
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Same here.

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WarioMan
 Posted: Jan 2 2009, 04:57 PM
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Great reviews, especially on the Alien series. I have all four of them, including the AvP ones, on DVD.

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i_love_ami
 Posted: Jan 2 2009, 11:17 PM
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This review is mainly here as a joke. My brother said that I should review this one because it is a movie, kinda.

Today's Review: The Wizard of Oz 3: Dorathy Goes to Hell

Summary: Just to warn you know, this is a movie made by Cinnemassacre (The Angry Video Game Nerd), so it's got a sick sense of humor and it's offensive to just about everyone on some level. Now that the warning is out of the way, on with the review.

Dorathy is back living with Uncle Crunch and Auntie Eminem. One day, a couple of Jawas show up to sell two robot helpers, who turn out to be Tin Man and Tictoc (from Return to Oz). They have come to tell Dorathy that Oz is in trouble. This time, Satan is out to take over Oz. What's worse, he has the Ruby Slippers. Dorathy rushes home to find her aunt and uncle dead (in an obvious Star Wars reference). The Jawas are revealed to be Munchkins that were kicked out of Munchkinland.

The crew arrives in Munchkinland and the mayor explains what's going on. It turns out that the red brick road leads to Hell and Satan is using it to attack Oz. There's also a grey brick road that leads to K-Mart. Dorathy and her friends from the first two movies set out for the Emerald City. On the way, they're attacked by flying monkies. Dorathy rips out the Tin Man's heart and he makes quick work of the monkies.

Apon arriving to the Emerald City, they discover that the great Oz has been possessed by Satan. They also learn of his new weapon, Super Mecha Death Christ (his name is longer, but I'm not even going to try to type in the whole thing). They barely escape the wrath of Super Mecha Death Christ, who goes on a rampage, destroying everyone and everything that gets in his way, shouting, "F*CKERS!" the whole time.

Our heroes return to Munchkinland to tell the mayor what happened. After a brief encounter with the Witch of the Middle, our heroes decide to follow the red brick road to Hell to confront Satan. However, the Scarecrow can't take it anymore and decides to follow the grey brick road to K-mart and buy a shotgun to kill himself. Dorathy tells Tin Man and the Lion to follow him. Who will prevail when Dorathy and Satan finally meet?

Why It's Cool: It's random and hilarious. Enough said. Oh, and there's music from various Godzilla movies used as well as a few scenes of destruction from Terror of Mechagodzilla.

What I Didn't Like: By the end of the movie, you're gonna be saying, "What the hell?! That's how it ends?!"

Do I Recommend? Only if you have a very sick sense of humor and aren't easily offended (though you will find something that will offend you).

If you still want to see this movie after reading this review, here's the link:
http://www.cinemassacre.com/new/?p=629

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i_love_ami
 Posted: Jan 7 2009, 03:20 AM
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Once again, this is another thing I found on the internet, but I feel like it's worth mentioning.

Today's Review: Red vs Blue: Reconstruction
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Summary: This is the latest plotline from the Red vs Blue series (all I've seen of the earlier epidsodes so far are a bunch of PSAs and clips on Youtube, all of which were funny). Anyway, the cast of Red vs Blue (minus Tucker, Donut, Doc and Tex) are back in their most epic adventure yet.

Reconstruction (each episode being a chapter of the story, which is why you could consider it a movie) begins when mysterious events befall the oupost at Valhalla. Members of both the Red and Blue armies posted there all turn up dead after showing strange behaviors. Only a single soldier survived. He's brought before a representative from "Command". He tells his story and is taken away for further questioning. Agent Washington, one of the Freelancer agents, is called in to investigate.

Wash is sent to Blood Gulch, where most of the original episodes took place. He first tries Blue base, but it turns out that Sister (Grif's sister, I think) is the only Blue left. She explains that the others were re-located to other outposts. Of course, being Grif's sister, she thinks that Wash is a cop. He gives up on talking to her and heads for Red base. After confronting cardboard cut-outs of Donut, Simmons and Grif, he finds Sarge and Lopez (a robot that only speaks Spanish). Sarge explains that he stayed behind while the others were re-assigned and that Caboose can help Wash.

Wash then moves on to find the loveable character of the show, Pvt Micheal J. Caboose. He tries to convince Lt Miller that he needs one of his soldiers. Miller refuses until Wash says that he needs Caboose. Miller agrees to hand over Caboose. In fact, he's happy to be rid of him. Jones is sent down to the brig to untie Caboose (and dies in the process). Wash and Caboose head off to find another of RvB's famous characters.

Wash and Caboose head for another outpost, where Caboose comes under fire from a sniper rifle (which misses him horribly). While Wash takes cover, Caboose realizes who is shooting at him. It's the Pvt Leonard L. Church, leader of the Blues in Blood Gulch. He gets even more pissed off when he finds out that Wash is a Freelancer. Wash explains that due to their experiance with Omega (Tex's AI, also known as O'Malley), Church and Caboose might be able to aid him in his investigation. As they head back to Valhalla, an evil entity known as the Meta (formerly Agent Maine) watches them leave and reconfigures a message that Recovery Command sent to Wash into a message telling Sarge that Wash is a Blue and has reassembled the Blue team from Blood Gulch.

At Valhalla, the team has to infiltrate the investigation site, which has been locked down. After a funny distraction, they find Sheila (the Blues' tank AI) on the ship that crashed in Valhalla and started this whole mess. Tex was on board the ship and what became of her is unknown, but Wash believes that the Meta has her AI. Before Wash can explain, he gets a distress call from Agent South Dekota.

South is under attack from the Meta, who is after her AI, Delta. She plans to give up Delta to the Meta. Just as she's about to, Wash and the Blues show up to fight the Meta. However, the Meta not only has Tex's ability to turn invisible, but also has Wyoming's ability to freeze time. The Meta stops time and escapes. Due to their history, Wash kills South and puts Delta into Caboose's armor. He also explains what the Meta is. The Meta has been collecting the AI's from other Freelancers. Delta also mentions the Alpha, which is the original AI from project Freelancer. Wash tells him to shut up and Church says he might know where the Meta is going in order to power it's suit back up.

They head for Zanzibar and get into another brief encouter with the Meta. They almost have it when Sarge, Grif and Simmons drive in out of nowhere and begin firing on Wash and Church. Caboose has been knocked out and the Meta takes Delta. We are then shown a brief flashback showing how Sarge found Grif and Simmons. Grif is now a Sgt like Sarge and tries to take command, but often argues with Sarge, who already hates him.

During the fight, the Meta disguises itself as a Red. Grif falls for it and the Meta starts throwing stuff at him (which Sarge finds funny). During Grif's misery, Wash calls for a truce between the two teams. They all go to Caboose, to see what happened to him. Church has Simmons distract Sarge as he leaves his body (Caboose killed Church in one of the older episodes and now he's supposedly a ghost in a robot body) to go into Cabooses mind. Delta left a message in Caboose's mind telling Church that "Memory is the Key". However, Wash sees Church in his "Ghost Form" and after a brief explaination, Wash comes up with a plan. The team will infiltrate Command, find the Alpha and stop the Meta once and for all.

I'm not going any further once again due to a huge plot twist involving the location of the Alpha AI.

Why It's Cool: For starters, Red vs Blue is hilarious. Also, aside from a few PSAs and announcements from Bungie Studios, we get to see the RvB cast with Halo 3 graphics (though the Blood Gulch scenes are still done with Halo 2). Also, for a web series, it's got a pretty good plot that isn't just a bunch of references (or stolen material). It's also interesting to hear the conversation between the director of the Freelancer program and a concerned Chairman about what's going on.

What I Didn't Like: Donut and Tucker are absent from Reconstruction save for a cardboard cut-out of Donut and Tucker calling Command (and we only know it's him from his catch phrase, "Bow Chicka Wow Wow!"). Also, you need to know a bit of the backstory to RvB.

Do I Recommend? Yes, especially if you read my fan-fic. It's got the same combination of Epic story and random humor. If you want to check it out, here's the link to Chapter 1 (while you're there, check out their PSAs):
http://rvb.roosterteeth.com/archive/?id=280

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i_love_ami
 Posted: Jan 10 2009, 06:50 PM
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Alright, got some breakfast in me, just got off the phone with my brother and have a decently running internet connection today. It's time for a review. I doubt that a whole lot of you have heard of this movie (I know that Ben went out and rented it after I referenced it in an early episode of my fan fic). It's an old one (my dad and my uncle saw it in theaters) but nontheless, it's a good time.

Today's Review: Monty Python and the Holy Grail
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Summary: I'll try to describe the plot without ruining the funny, but that's going to be hard considering that most of this movie is just plain silly.

It starts out with King Arthur and his loyal companion (I think his name is Patsy) searching for knights to join him at the Round Table. He comes apon a village where the peasants know too much about politics and don't recognize him as king. He quickly leaves and comes across the Black Knight. The two end up fighting and King Arthur is victorious for cutting off the Black Knight's arms and legs. "It's just a flesh wound!"

Elsewhere, Sir Bedavir (spelled right?) is trying to educate some rather stupid peasants on how to tell if someone is a witch (this is the Dark Ages after all). Seeing Bedavir's impressive knowledge, Arthur knights him. While we don't get so see how Arthur found them, he is joined by Sir Lancelot, Sir Galahad and Sir Robin. On their way from Camelot, God tells them that they must seek out the Holy Grail.

So they set out on their quest, finally coming across a castle filled with some rather rude French People.
Galahad: What are you doing here in England?
French Guy: Mind your own business!
Finally loosing his patience with the French, King Arthur and his knights try two separate attempts to invade the castle, both with less than desireable outcomes.

After the French taunting, King Arthur and his knights split up and end up on their own wacky adventures such as facing a three-headed killer, a castle full of women, the Knights Who Say Ni and the Swamp King. Eventually, they re-unite and go off to find Tim the Enchanter. When they meet him, he agrees to show them the way to a cave with the last words of Joseph, who knew where the Holy Grail is. However, the cave is guarded by a white rabbit. You laugh now, but that is one vicious rabbit.

After getting past the rabbit, narrowly escaping the Black Beast and crossing over the Gorge of Eternal Peril, Arthur at last finds the Castle of Argh. Will he find the Holy Grail within? Watch and find out.

I know I didn't say much in the summary, but I didn't want to ruin too much of the funny for you.

Why It's Cool: It's old British comedy. You don't get much cooler than that. Plus, nearly every scene will have something to make you laugh. The actors did a great job at their characters and the humor is just so random, you can't help but laugh.

What I Didn't Like: The ending is a bit disappointing (though nowhere near as disappointing as the end of AVPR). And the dated visuals may make this film a bit unappealing to today's audience.

Do I Recommend? Hell yes! If you haven't seen this movie yet, you must do so! It's on DVD now, so don't wait. You can probably find it at just about any video rental place.

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TeckTheRocker
 Posted: Jan 11 2009, 12:16 AM
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The Holy Grail is one kick ass movie xD

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Zillaman
 Posted: Jan 11 2009, 08:52 PM
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I liked this movie so much that I bought both this and Life of Brian on DVD. biggrin.gif

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i_love_ami
 Posted: Jan 11 2009, 08:57 PM
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I haven't seen the Life of Brian yet. Is it good?

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Zillaman
 Posted: Jan 11 2009, 09:28 PM
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Not good, Great! biggrin.gif

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i_love_ami
 Posted: Jan 12 2009, 12:18 AM
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I'd check it out, but the only Monty Python movie that they have here is "The Meaning of Life".

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Zillaman
 Posted: Jan 13 2009, 12:17 AM
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That one is good too. Life of Brian might offend you if your religious.

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i_love_ami
 Posted: Jan 13 2009, 03:23 AM
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trust me, im hard to offend

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Zillaman
 Posted: Jan 16 2009, 05:15 AM
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I see.

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